Hello, Fans.

Welcome, as they often say in pieces like this, or CONGRATULATIONS as they say on the instructions of computers and other kit, as if you've won something or been particularly clever to buy their product. "CONGRATULATIONS ON BUYING THE FARNSBARNES UNDERWATER ONION PEELER" for example. Well, I regret to say, rather than adding an article I've taken one down this week, because its subject asked me to. Can you guess which one it was? I can. The world is poorer without it but I don't want to fall out with the lyricist it was about even though he's a grumpy old spoilsport who can't take a joke.

Margaret Thatcher died recently.

In other news, My mum isn't very well at all, we had pasta for dinner last night, Meryl Streep didn't ring me up to ask me to take down "Streep To Play Ringo" story, I went up the shop to get a paper this afternoon, Caitlin Moran still won't say why she unfollowed me on Twitter, nobody got killed in the Grand National a couple of weeks ago, Katie Melua is making a great album for Autumn release, Caro Emerald is poised to jump into the UK album charts soon, on Dramatico, and I really MUST cut my toenails.

That's about it. I'm not feeling happy or sad. Just normal. A bit grumpy if truth be told (for a change). Ah well, Bob's your uncle and vanish your arm, as my little brother, Dick, thought we were saying, when it was actually "Bob's your uncle and Fanny's your aunt".

Have a mooch around and when you leave, put out the light and then put out the light.

Love

Mike
xxx

Stop being weak.