Published on February 10th, 2012

A new study by the University Of Minnesota has revealed that one in three people is shorter than the other two. In a series of experiments, it was discovered that when three people were asked to stand together, the one on the left was invariably shorter than the other two in the same group. Genetically this syndrome has been traced to a newly-discovered  “Triumvirarsum shortarsum” gene which appears only in one third of males. It has the effect of stunting growth (making smoking unnecessary) and slightly deafening the right ear, leading to a tendency for the subject to stand with the left ear nearest to the others in the grouping.

Our picture shows Mike Batt (left)  talking to random taller colleagues Sir Tim Rice and DJ/songwriter Mike Rad, who recently started a central heating business inspired by a typographical error in the spelling of his name. Sir Tim said “I’m hoping to get a knighthood one day” – as this picture was taken a long time ago. Mike Rad said “Look at my tie, it’s much more sensible than yours, Batty”.


  1. Posted by Marmaduke Gibbons on March 3rd, 2012, 13:23

    I wrote to that Mike Rad many years ago (when he was still called Mike Read and Marmaduke was just my mate’s nickname for me and his surname was, and still would be if he was alive, Gibbons), telling him about our John Betjeman musical. A couple of years later David Essex is singing Myfanwy on TOTP. Life’s full of coincidences.


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